Why do humans put ourselves through some of the situations we do? Why do we put up with certain behavior from our partners/love interests, etc? Why do some men/women take special people who really treat them well for granted?
Life is just full of a lot of "whys" really, I could go on all day I am sure.
I guess what I am really wanting right at this moment (as random as this may sound), a male's perspective on some things (or a few males, as many as want to comment).
I will make this numbered. I'm not sure how many I intend to ask, we'll see how it turns out, one at a time for the male mind tho:
When a man likes a woman who is a 'lady in the streets, hoe in the sheets', we take that as a given that he loves a sexy, classy, presentable woman in public and a woman who goes wild and sexy JUST FOR HIM in the bedroom.
Now, my question is, when you get that woman, who SHOULD BE everything you said you wanted, why is she not good relationship material? Instead men seem to throw her into the "Friend with Benefits" or "Fuck Buddy" category, and then go off and find some haint of a woman who is troublesome, loves to cause drama, is overly jealous, clingy, gives him hell and treats him like shit, he gives her the ring and takes her home to mama.
What gives?
Please enlighten me as well as other women who would be wondering.
Not a clue.
ReplyDeleteI'm not the best to ask on relationship stuff - I've been with the Mrs since she was 16 and I was 18.
My only take on it is... the grass is always greener. Sadly I think too many people spend too much time thinking that something is better over there - the party is really swinging in the next bar down the street I'll leave this one to go see, I know everyone is getting better sex than me so I'll dump the woman who adores me and go find out what I'm missing... etc. etc.
Is this a trend you note a lot in people? Can't say I think it is from my view of things - maybe that is just cultural differences between us Brits and our colonial cousins.
Maybe the drama thing is all about belief that there is a commitment worth fighting for. I don't know, I'm drawn towards the Buddist suffering ideas - if the woman is "lady in the streets, hoe between the sheets" (there's a phrase you wouldn't normally here me using LOL!) perhaps he thinks that is too easy for it to have intrinsic long term value - there isn't enough suffering to suggest it is of value to him...
I don't know really
People do seem inclined by nature to believe that they don't deserve good things and perhaps adhere to the old addage "Too Good to be True"? I think that men say they want those things, and I believe they do, but I think some don't think that a woman who can possess those attributes to be perhaps trustworthy? Like maybe she has been this for too many men, or if I marry her, I cannot trust her? Those things are simply not true.
ReplyDeleteA lot of women, myself included who are really enthusiastic 'pleasers', wanting to treat their lover very well and give him his heart's desire, well--we can really get hurt sometimes. Just because I am passionate, enthusiastic and talented in the sack does not mean that I would do those things with just anybody, or that once I was with a man I adored that I couldn't be faithful to him... I think those things make me an even better choice for a wife or serious relationship.
Why opt for the cold, but old-fashioned cookie cutter wife, then go cheat for what you really need when you can have it all, and we all deserve the best we can find in another...we just spend a lot of time calling ourselves bastards and believing we are undeserving of good things in this life. Happiness is our birthright.